In this post, we talk physics. Thus the photo, left, of myself with my daughter Haley, husband Dwayne and family friend Lucas hanging out with Einstein in Washington, DC last summer.
Last post I mentioned a book I’m writing called OK No Matter What. Its the distillation of what I know works best to shift people from problem to no problem. I knew I’d explained the 5 steps pretty clearly in the book when I got a note back from my editor saying, “I tried your process on my stress-related headaches. It works.”
It was great confirmation but not a surprise. When you understand what stress is and how our bodies are designed to resolve it, relief is logical.
As the book gets closer to release, I’m finding myself wanting to talk about the topic of stress and emotional well-being more.
Extreme emotional well-being is an option available to all of us no matter what has happened in our lives or is happening now. Some of the best students of this, I have found, are those in extreme life situations because suffering provides intense motivation and focus. And the relief is so palpable.
What underlies the process is physics. We see colors because they are frequencies of light perceived by our eyes. We hear sounds because they are frequencies perceived by our ears. We feel emotions because emotions are frequencies perceived by our emotional system.
That’s why orange looks different from red, a C note sounds different from an F, and embarrassment feels different than anger. Simple high school physics.
(Except the emotional application isn’t yet taught in high school but will one day be if I have anything to do with it…)
Unlike color and sound, emotional frequencies are generated by our bodies. Uncomfortable emotions – stress and distress – are frequencies we generate and perceive. This gives us control over our emotions to a degree most of us can’t yet imagine possible.
Like every body system, our emotional anatomy has an intrinsic self-balancing feedback loop. A loop we are clueless about. Learning to consciously use this natural mechanism to rebalance our emotions at will is the most life-enhancing skill we can master. It is the key to being OK no matter what.
Which is why it should also be taught in schools.
The other day something happened that caused a a friend of my daughters to ask, “Won’t your mom be upset?” My daughter’s response was to laughingly say, “My mom doesn’t get upset.”
This is basically true but certainly didn’t used to be. And there’s nothing special about me other than time on task. I’ve simply spent a lot of years understanding how our emotional systems are designed to work and learning to use my own pretty well. Teaching others too, of course.
Over the next week when you feel a strong emotion, think of it simply as a frequency you are generating and perceiving. And leave a comment below to let me know what happens when you do. See ya!